Love is certainly all around us. What with Valentine’s day being around the corner. Shops are busy readying and hoping for big sales. Youngsters are hoping for that surprise gift and a promise of undying love from secret crushes, long term couples wonder what surprises are in store from each other; some hoping for the ‘question to be popped’; while some dread ‘the question might be popped’.
Seniors know better taking it all in their stride. The moral police gear up for the day that shows how the ‘bad western influences’ are ruining our culture.
Although we hail from a land of the kamasutra, with carvings in Khajuraho that would make sunny leone blush, we are not “like that”. We do not “do that”. No, in fact, all one billion of us are indeed“immaculate conceptions”.
So after a decade or maybe more of trying to dissuade us by disrupting all valentine-ish things on sale, they’ve decided to embrace it. I guess if you can’t beat it you might as well join it. So from this year on we shall be seeing it turning into a mass marriage day of sorts. Who knows, if this turns into a success and an annual event, years from now we can claim it as being our festival all along. Blame it on a ‘sant valant’ bhau who existed in the year 600 BC and originally sought to bring couples together in ‘holy matrimony’. Fondly known as bhau(brother) to all the young happy couples, eventually attaining sainthood for his noble work.
We are, after all, known for our ‘inspirational copies’, oops, I mean ‘works’, ‘inspirational works’ and our love for adding masala to things, reinventing them and staking our claim. Much like tea which, with some cooking and masala has became our ‘statement chai’.
Try as we might, the world is getting smaller, it’s harder to contain the fusion of cultures and people just can’t help falling in love. Blame it on cupid, but when our hearts speak, the brain goes numb, ‘Dil hain ke manta nahin’.
So love is here to stay, but what is love? Is it a grand gesture that one displays on a said day to prove oneself and one’s love?
I remember at a party we attended a year ago a guest brought up the topic of what each one did for their valentine. He went on to gloat about planning a candle light dinner on the terrace with a five course meal for his wife, complete with serenade etc. It seemed like he was most pleased with himself, and he warned us all before starting his narration that he might be upping the scale for all present. Obviously he thought he was the grand daddy of valentine gifting. Doubt many were impressed with this little show offy story.
But I have to ask, is this how we measure the quantum of love, how big the presents exchanged are, and how much money has been splashed?
Doing something extra to make one feel special is nice but to me love means a lot more;
While i like receiving gifts; Rather than a loud over-the-top announcement, it’s the little things that speak volumes.
Love to me is;
When my partner buys the gardening gloves because he’s seen me work on my plants,
When he fills the car tank up with fuel, gets the tyres checked, and loads my favourite music cd, so I am safe and not inconvenienced at 6:00am,
When he plans a trip for my birthday and takes me to dinner to a quiet little place that he knows I would like,
When your partner offers you a bite of the cheesecake knowing that you are lactose intolerant,
When your partner buys that quirky kettle even though you don’t need another, just cause it’s your sort of thing,
When your partner watches news and the most boring cricket match just to be with you,
When your partner not only buys you the new phone but transfers all your data on to it,
When your partner declines a dinner invite just because he knows you wouldn’t enjoy it,
When a nudge is enough to indicate it’s time for some coffee,
The list is endless.
Whatever love means to you and however you wish to celebrate it ,
Wishing you all, not just a happy valentines day, but love in your lives today, tomorrow and always!